Sunday, May 27, 2012

Am I ready to do this? I think so..mmmmh


May 25, 2012

Pumping my thoughts in to the world!
Appears quite fancy the thought. Is it actually possible for anyone to get rid of their thoughts? Yeah get rid! When you write them for getting opinion of others or influence any, it is called actually writing on a purpose. Now, when I write I call it sometimes to get rid of my continuous thoughts which in a process build unnecessary maturity in me, which I actually hate many times. There is an excuse for writing memories which I call to preserve those moments. The reason I am trying to interpret these types of writing is, on one Sunday I came up with a thought that actually didn’t stop till today.

I finished with the argument with myself that day that on how many weekends I am going to pass my time. I got to do something really serious (fun with stupidity of my own), so then I came up with researching a topic every week and write about it.
I thought of various topics…
Things that passed my mind are like...

‘Beauty! How much it is adored? Gender! What is the reality?’
‘Where are we Indian woman standing in choosing the right relationship?’
‘Does woman’s entry into new life of marriage and kids pass the cloud of her dream away?
‘I hesitate to write the word ‘sex’! Why?’
‘Expectations! How are we dealing with this?’
‘Phase of Excitement Phase!’


Many more knock my stuffed skull everyday (just want no one to copy those above titles as their book titles :P)

I finally knew this is what I got to do to keep me busy. It not only helps me to understand me better, it also helps me talk to as many people around, with as many weird topics I want to. I am hoping to meet great people on this way or at least weird’s one’s who has like me joined in the course of never ending learning’s by keeping their very own life at stake. And my first hope is people will discuss things openly. Otherwise, more than opinions I could fill only my perception to the thoughts I get. However, this study will unfold few of those questions my mind encountered when I was busy moving from a rough phase of life to this myself.

‘Myself is such a classic thing’!

Yes I write the above also.

పడవ

ఆట  పడవ 
పోతావా తనతో 

గాలి  వాన  దూరానా 
నిదే తుంపర్ల  నావ 

మానను  ముంచునే 
మర్రిచేట్టువా  నువ్వు 

మరిచేదవా 
నువ్వు  కాగితమని 

నీకు  నీటి మీద 
ఇంత  మోజేందుకే 

చిన్ననాటి చెలిమి వలె 
ని  జ్ఞాపకం 

అ  బురద  నీటిలో 
నిన్ను ఎన్నిసార్లు ఈదమని  వదిలానో 

రెండో పడవ 
చేయటానికి వచ్చునే 

నా మనసు చెప్పింది 
కాగితమే అది కూడా మునుగునని 

నే నిలిచా చూస్తూ కదలని  పడవ   వంక.... 






Sunday, May 20, 2012


Love
Planned are those moments spent not in love.
A person’s heart is not always in a condition to both give love and also take love.
It can do both in complete balanced conditions.
May be in perfect (I don’t like to use perfect, may be ‘complete’ is apt) relationship both of them know to balance this, and they also might be good at understanding when the other person is in the state of receiving love (and not in giving state of mind). It takes lot of understanding between couples to reach this balance… And the tougher part is how they maintain it as years pass by, when the needs change, when they have kids and when they grow old. Sometimes one might totally forget to give back when deeply enjoying the love given. It is the toughest of all I guess, may be it is the odd part, I still have to figure out this.
I think in a relationship two persons should be very good friends. This is old line but I have new definition in my thoughts. Sometimes there comes this question, ‘What am I getting if I be with you?” Nothing to be in shock, but it is fair to ask yourself sometimes this question. That is when you know the other person is in receiving state (I leave it to people to understand this, as I can simplify only to this level). So my point is, when I mean friends, both of them have first their own individual lives. They always have this individual life going on, and at times giving your partner chance to be part of your individual life, at times when you think he/she will enjoy what you are doing, at times you think your friends can be his/her friends, at times where that trip you want to go alone might make you feel to share with him/her and at times when you think problems can be shared and relieved sharing with him/her. Just like friends, only difference is you remember them first and you decide to share all (may not be all) these experiences of life with them. That is what I think the other person expects from you. You can answer that question of what you get from other person when you have a beautiful individual life. The need to be confident, with good friends around and enjoying your own single life comes there.

Not necessarily you want to do all this to get an amazing life partner, I recommend all of you at all ages of their life to practice this. Be confident, do what you want to do (especially all those which you think you can do when you are by yourself) and keep that crowd around you happy. Nothing else matters!

Do I sound like Oprah now :P?

Marathon Today!


Before starting about the experience, here is my promise to myself that I will participate any marathon around hereafter. I have seen a peacock, many camels and many many humans who tried to spend their Sunday differently. The marathon took place away from city, near to a small village where I guess people use the road that we walked with very difficulty, as their daily route of transportation. There were large stones, thorn plants and dusty mud like soft bed slipping shoe into it on the way to the starting point to marathon. The organizers had built a small hut shed, made of clay and bamboos and properly shaded with grass on top of hut.

We were four and packed was not only water but also so much enthusiasm. I also carried some thoughts to post something in my blog which might interest me. Till we reached the place, my focus couldn’t come back from those villages we passed on the way. Those houses, cowsheds, olden cots in front of the houses with old men sitting and relaxing, crops and farm houses…all made me think of my village. My village! Could something replace this in my life? I really want something to replace this, something which makes me want to go every time. I stopped thinking of it for a while and tried to forget those broken dreams. I don’t like to call them broken dreams, rather they are unfulfilled dreams. May be I am a living devil.

Weather was unlike Gurgaon at 6a.m, the pot is not yet boiled…I mean the Sun was yet to boil us, so we had light breezes coming our way. Though it was dusty, whenever we got onto better road, we immediately opened car windows to get the breeze. Fresh air can be sold in kilos at gurgaon. I think even I am ready to buy. My friend was having more than good time, driving the village roads, with less or no vehicles passing by.

Once we reached, one group was gathered to start the marathon. Some cheerleaders (males though) were shouting and clapping to encourage us to start. One among us was in 10km run, so he ran ahead of us and we couldn’t meet him till last. And everyone were on their own. Many people were part of it, most them where in their 30’s and to my shock there were many women, a lot married who came along with their kids. Seeing people crossing by me, and thinking about them, I was distracted with some noises. How negative I can think of to write distracted when I heard birds chirping. It was a nice feeling. Till I finish 5km, I told to myself not to stop or rest in between. People were not talking much to each other, in spite of it being a fun run than a competition. After 2.5Km we have to take a U-turn and get come back to the starting point. I started walking after U-turn for a while. And there came those cools guys with cameras. They were official photographers for the event and cheered up people capturing if not missed moments. And I have to tell you that really made me run much better. Every half kilometer when I see the photographer from far, I start running, thinking I have to run while I am on photo. Finally, came back to the end point without a single stop anywhere.

They arranged parathas for all of them, which were made in the hut in front of us. They were tasty.  There I was sitting at an open window in the hut which has no doors anywhere and seeing at the people opening the breezers and beer bottles.  These were provided by organizers. That was all a shock for me. I thought this run will remind everyone about their health and I ended up thinking people are much more than I thought into fun. Never mind, judging doesn’t bring much. If only there was one person who stood strong among the people organizing by not supporting this alcohol thing in the early morning pleasant marathon reminding how important health is, then…? If only!!
I will attend again yet another marathon, with the hope to see different things.

Against something is a gene again. We too took some photos. On return journey a camel was walking opposite to the car and we stopped a while to see it. I thought if it is free like this always and if these were like other animals like street dogs and cats free to live and walk without owners. May be not!

As we entered the city, I felt good and when I felt so, I pitied my mind for being happy for this. Life has its own beauty. Sometimes you enjoy which you daily crib about.

Just two hours back I did all this. Lot more to do on this Sunday morning. Good morning chirpy birds!!!

Saturday, May 12, 2012

Coffee Bar

I could add the title before even starting writing, my room is like some coffee bar.
With a new book (I dunno how often I buy new books, that has become a habit more than a hobby) on my lap I thought of adding my bucket list. Such a nice day to think what is still pending in my life to do. I thought it would be like big list. But it wasn't easy. I first thought of the list of animals I wanted. First came horse (after dreamer movie I really want to have one) and then one big dog (should be almost my height) and ..my all time favorites rabbit, turtle, squirrel and fishes. May be I want a monkey too (if I wont marry a monkey :P) to keep some fun in life. By the way, I should keep my list secret, everyone copies these days from me :D

I was thinking this early morning, may be men and women are hanging on opposite sides in the earth (assuming globe) and in between there is a magnet (all physics experts are requested not to comment). When they come close they get attached and get so closer like two iron pieces on either side of magnet and when they go far they might be hanging in their own zones with that magnetic waves or whatever. It might be tough to get into another magnetic zone, may be it is repulsive at times. After all earth is so big, how many zones one has to hit to find the right iron piece.

Thursday, May 10, 2012

Motivating Weather and Social Realities-Gurgaon Mood Changers!


Back at gym, a girl asked me a fine question when I came out of steam, ‘Are you from Hyderabad?” I just hated her analysis on me and the exact way she guessed something like that. I said yes and didn’t try to ask how she knew. Instead, I asked if she was from Hyderabad too. Then, she said she worked there before and can recognize people from there by face. More smart than me. But then, I thought time to make new friends, and she could make an impression at the first minute by asking a question like that, unlike many women who can suppress or less care to ask that. Then with a series of nice questions, I told her I would meet her after kickboxing class Monday and we can go sopping. She confirmed saying, ‘I hope you will not kick me’. After all, I have to come there everyday and I would really get bored without friends. But why have I become so choosy. May be my friends made me like this. All those whole bunch of old good friends, who make it tough for new list of friends. Standards ah! Never mind, they have there own way, like the one who got me at gym. From the place where the row of treadmills is located, we can see many employees passing by, in their most stylish clothes everyday. Thankfully, they cannot see us. My office is above the gym and I like the thought that above my head my colleagues are working hard and filling fat in their available empty cells. Yeah cell!

I forgot them. I liked drawing ‘cell’ always. Making a big round and drawing organelles inside in the exact way it is in the book initially. I was the one in the class to tell that we can keep the organelles wherever we want. And I knew they won’t be like the way they are in the text book picture. I hope I have not written this already in my blog. One day in my Masters, I woke up in the morning and took a book, in the last page, drew the dream of replication (it is a pathway that happens in cell). I drew some images and then went to ask my lecturers on the same day and asked if that dream would be possible. I asked and shown that representation to many I remember. I thought the process in my book was wrong and mine was right. I got answers to them in IISc, that all the processes are not right, and they are assumed by someone, which are being confirmed or said wrong by someone or the other like me later. And my assumptions might also be right. But then, I always feel great when I think of this. Like some big scientist some process came to dream and shown me a different way of it. Now, I don’t say this to anyone. May be I should tell.

Saving thoughts of the month,
Recharge your internet with a basic plan, very basic and use it limited. Now I write my post on a word document offline and upload it after it is done. Not only saving but, laptop is going to be with me few more weeks only so it was better to recharge basic.

And gym has automatically reduced my food expenses. However, I didn’t end up drinking lassi’s, they are the only way to cool down the body in this hot weather. This morning in rickshaw with hot flames passing my stole covered face, made me think, that I should earn so much that, this heat should stop outside my vehicle.

Motivating weather!!

Sensitive to social realities! The issues in gurgaon are sensitive. Cultural ethics have not reached even the roads; forget about houses and people’s mind. In front of the office building at 9pm, weekday, you may find people mostly cabdrivers, sitting on top of their cars holding a tall beer or something else. I am not surprised, have been preparing to see much more weird things here. For two rupees change a tollgate, a guy shot the employee sitting at toll. I might have heard these things in many places in India, but the sensitivity of the matter is to be questioned. People’s magnificent minds have not been pushed to reach their next levels here. What should I do for them? My question in silence has become my everyday time pass. Will I pass my time till I leave from here? Is everyone doing same?
  

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

How often we give up?


Having an imagination of clear thoughts cannot always lay route to the clear words.
Loads of interrupted solid valuable lessons passed my mind recently. I have to say I forgot to capture them; nevertheless I end up giving a conclusion that whatever I write now is the latest of those thoughts and would cover all the maturity that other thoughts bought me.

In the experience of leading an undisturbed life recently, I realized that when I was young I was ready to take up risks. In order to keep less confusion in life I started learning to be proper and am always trying to figure out ways to make things perfect and I realize I am missing one big element of life in this course. The part of keeping life less stressful is fine, but what about totally giving up on some things to avoid or smoothen your daily life? Is it not less challenging? Figured out this or gave a damn, either case I decided to live life at the edge, taking the necessary risks that show to the world what I taught to myself.

An hour and a half past the day started with one new thought. If hope is a good thing and having ‘no hope’ is also a good thing. If hope keeps you going, having ‘no hope’ also keeps you going. If hope gives you happiness it’s the same with ‘no hope’. But one thing that hope can bring and the other counter part cannot is ‘the person’.

Optimism till death!! Uneven methodology in creating required dose of happiness for a sound sleep!

Yeah sleepy! Goodnight and Wonderful No-Hope Counter Part Dreams!


Super proud

 My little brother is no more little.. He has grown up so big that now he went to a new country to study I feel quite proud of him and also ...